Enforced Unschooling

 

Child is bucked off of horse, hits head on fence, gets concussion. A few days later same child dives into bed and hits the headboard, loses vision for several hours, worsens concussion symptoms.

Current treatment for concussion symptoms means that there is to be: no school work; no exercise; no television; no computer; no learning anything new. Well then. Most of us plunk sick kids down in front of the tv, give them liquids and let them rot their brains while their bodies heal. Time to work out a new approach. She’s not supposed to be reading much, either, but I’ve allowed her reread all of her favorite novels because, dude, what’s left?

For the first week my daughter lived under the trestle table in our living room. We padded it up with comforters and pillows and she listened to audio books and put beads onto pipe cleaners. Then she crawled out and painted a little bit.

The following week she read, probably too much. Percy Jackson, The Red Pyramid, Harry Potter… No horse back riding, no climbing trees, no multiplication, what in the heck did we do? Housework. We bought chickens and took care of the rest of our animals better than we usually do–spotless cages, well-bedded stalls, extra hay. We watched a little bit of tv and I allowed her to check her email twice that week.

We have gone to the zoo, had a few play dates, went to a spring break retreat in the mountains, ‘learned’ Reiki, told stories, watched Daddy capture a swarm of bees, practiced showmanship (yes, technically exercise but we have to do *something*). We have relaxed, shopped, thrifted, cooked and eaten a lot of yummy food, built fairy houses, stomped in a mountain creek and found an old mix CD I made years ago with the best songs ever on it.

I’m something of a fatalist and believe that life is carrying us along in the direction we are meant to go. We can fight it, swim upstream as hard as we can, but the current is still going to drag us along to our destination. So it seems to me that this concussion episode was a series of events that have turned into stepping stones that have helped us to relax, detox, let go of some of the pressure of keeping up with the Jones’ (the homeschooling ones) and allowed us to enjoy tubing the currents in our own river. We waved on our way past.

 

What ‘Style’ of Homeschooler Are You?

I’ve come to detest this question. The ones about how do you do it? What curriculum do you use? They don’t bug me. The one about what schooling style is an irritating one, I must admit.

Why? Because I prefer the enigmatic to the strictly defined. I prefer wavering boundaries to tall, firm fences. I want to use wet-on-wet watercolors to back up the living book we read, the movie we watched, the video game we played and the field trip we took to learn specific material. I don’t want to be defined by someone else’s idea of perfect.

Years ago I wrote a post about ‘Frankenstinian’ homeschoolers, joking about how we were a combination of many different styles. Surely we still are but I don’t even want to joke about it any more. Steiner, Mason, the SOLs and CATs can kiss my lily white you-know-what. From now on we’re just learning, the best, most interesting, hands-on way we can. How about you?

 

Reevaluating Our Direction

This is something that happens now and then. It’s part of what keeps me in line as a homeschooling parent and also a part of what keeps me aware of what is going on the wider homeschooling world: reevaluating.

For several years now we’ve been dedicated to Waldorf. I love the flow, the way the curriculum appeals to not only the 3R’s of education but also to educating a child’s body and spirit, the art and the creative ways of approaching what can be very dry, academic subjects. But now I must reevaluate our educational direction or send the child to school (which I will never do!)

I love working with my daughter, spending time going over her lessons, *teaching* her and not simply giving her work to do on her own but that’s exactly what has happened over the past few months. I’ve spent my time working on various things, things from actual money-making work to zoning out on Facebook. Waldorf isn’t going to be more than a reference point on our map from now on, it probably will not serve as our compass.

Here’s the thing: it takes a LOT of planning, lesson writing, figuring out to teach from a Waldorf stance. It’s really not possible, living the life I live, to spend the time necessary to make a good educational go of it. It’s time to find curriculum materials to fill in the gaps that I can’t fill in myself. These ‘gaps’ are really more like canyons and crevasses as we move from the easy teaching involved in elementary education and into the more difficult things in middle school and beyond.

What will we do? Goal setting first, then materials research. We’re not suddenly going to be doing drills and bookwork 8 hours per day but maybe more reading and writing independently and a stronger focus on daily math drills, along with the textbooks. Charlotte Mason and Oak Meadow, most specifically, are appealing because materials can be easily found, often used and at low prices and these are still arts-fartsy (something we like) while also being laid out for us.

Let me know if you have recommendations.

 

Derby Day Salon

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These photos are from our 2nd annual Derby Day Salon. The idea of a musical salon is certainly not original to me and some of my homeschooling friends were doing these long before we started doing ours. Thanks to them, I had some guidance on how to put things together.

There was a printed program with all the names, pieces and instruments so that everyone knew when they would perform. The list of performances was based on trying to distribute the instruments throughout the program so that violin, piano, voice, cello and etc were in a rotation rather than a section. Sometimes the beginners go first, sometimes the younger children start, these two categories are not necessarily the same. As always, the musical ability of our friends is jaw-dropping. There’s a four year old who plays a violin the size of my shoe and an eleven year old who plays…everything!

Genres? Ran the gamut from Mozart to the Grateful Dead. Yeah we rock…and we also classical

For the closer there was a rousing rendition of Galway Races, just to get everyone into the spirit of gambling on the Kentucky Derby. Yes, there were mint juleps later but don’t worry, no one drank and then drove off with the kids.

 

The Swing

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Our daughter has a weird life. She has things that other children only dream of: a pony; trips to foreign countries; a dad who takes her hunting. However, there are things that a typical American kid has that she doesn’t. Things like a swing, a slide, trips to the carnival…

Well, after ages of pushing on my part and requesting on her part, Mark finally hung a swing for her. In typical Daddy/Mark style, the wait was worth it. The swing is extraordinary, hung high from the branch of a beech (?) tree over by the pool. The seat is double wide so that two kids can sit on it at one time. The ropes are long and so the arc of the swing is long and luxurious. It’s a perfect dreaming spot, shady in summer, breezy, quiet, with a view of the pasture, sheep pens and river. Yes, definitely worth the wait.

 

Creating More

Over the weekend we began the process of decluttering and giving away things that need to move on. The first two things were the doll houses that were the focal point of M’s play area for ages. The old one, the one my mom built for me when I was a kid, went to the attic. I just can’t toss it. It will make for a nice set of shelves when M changes rooms soon. The other one, the one we found on the trash pile outside a vacated rental property 15 years ago is going to be gifted or sold.

Suddenly M has so many more toys! It’s funny how reducing the load of options: plastic doll furniture; icky old stuff that never got touched; the huge space grabbers like the doll houses, made her space and the things that were left suddenly so much more attractive and fun to play with.

I’m looking forward to continuing this process. Anyone need some good books?

 

Apologies

I’ve been in a weird, nesting, introverted space for a while now with no signs of coming out. Still here, still homeschooling, still applying Steiner’s principles in as many ways as I can while still feeling like Minerva isn’t being academically left behind. (Left behind, not because of any holes I see in Waldorf pedagogy, only the holes in my ability to provide the necessary time and energy to bring those lessons regularly).

For now, I’m cleaning house, trying to keep up posting on my other blog and getting through the day to day things that challenge me to my bones.

 

Schooling, Rhythm and Life-Interruptus

My Great-Grandparents

Sometimes life gets in the way of homeschooling. It just does. No matter how hard I try to keep a nice flow going something always rings the bell and startles us out of our rhythm. Sometimes it won’t happen for a couple of months. Sometimes it happens every week for 3 or 4 weeks in a row. I’m not saying we don’t get anything done. We’re simply less efficient, we get fewer things accomplished and those with less finesse and grace. Non-essential but still crucially important and incredibly enjoyable subjects aren’t attended to.

I homeschool one incredibly easy, intelligent and interested child now. The days of having 5 kids in the house are done. We’re down to 3 and one of them is in college. On the other hand, I have a small business I’m working at which sometimes needs my attention. No shock there, right? There are times when I absolutely must spend hours of my time on the business and times like that are when our homeschooling suffers most.

I know that other homeschooling moms are trying to bring in extra income with small home businesses and am curious about how you manage your time? How do you get the chores, the business, the homeschooling all taken care of without leaving something out?

*If you’re wondering about the random graveyard pic, it’s up there because I was planning on writing about El Dia de los Muertos and Halloween. Life-Interruptus. Again.

 

Creating a Family

Minerva with her new aunts and uncles

We adopted 2 couples into our family to be aunts and uncles to Minerva.

One has been my good friend since high school. Tracy and Todd were our matron and man of honor when Mark and I got married. Honestly, our wedding would have been a mess without them organizing and cooking. We got married in a huge mountain meadow and we all horse camped for the duration. They don’t have kids and thus have the energy and creativity remaining to be fun and interesting on those days when I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep.

Terry is also a friend from school. We were adults-in-college together and became friends. We have a lot of life-parallels that I’ve never known with anyone else. She and her husband are fun, funky and kind and they love herding dogs.

I put candle lanterns all over the dam and bridge behind our house and just after dusk Mark, our 3 children and I all went across to the far side and the potential aunts and uncles waited on the bridge. Minerva led us all across the dam to the bridge where she told them what she had to offer them: songs, paintings, and when they’re old she’ll read to them in the nursing home. (This statement received a little titter). Then one member of each of our friend’s family told Minerva what they had to offer her in her already abundantly familied life.

Terry offered reading, sitting, food and a shoulder in such a beautifully eloquent and loving way that I got all teary eyed.. Todd offered the same but with the conditions that Minerva must always honor Mark and I; do her best in school; and that she give to/help those in need.  Terry and Sidney nodded their heads as Todd spoke and added that to their own list.

A toast to our new family!

Then Minerva led us off the bridge surrounded by her new aunts and uncles and we all came inside and toasted our new family.  Then we ate garlic encrusted venison with fruit compote; ratatouille on romaine lettuce leaves; salmon spread; feta and olive dip; and other small bites.

It was fun. It was also a life changing event for all of us, I believe. Minerva was so unbelievably excited to have these wonderful friends accept her into their families and make them, officially, a part of ours.

This all started as a desire for godparents but since we are not traditionally religious, asking our likewise not-religious friends to take on our child’s religious upbringing would have been ridiculous. Having them as family means they can influence her, love her and that she can love them and enjoy their company without a whole lot of confusion about what we’re all supposed to be doing. This is about companionship, strong and positive adult role models and, because they’re all enough like my family to be hungry all of the time, it’s about food…for our bodies, our hearts and our souls.

 

The Doldrums

It’s summer time and the livin’ is easy…as long as the air conditioning is on full blast and the pool is clean. Despite my best laid plans to not take the summer off, we kind of have. We’ve had a lot of visitors, a lot to do, a lot of disruptions and appointments that have kept us from doing much focused learning.

The little one has been riding quite a lot but I won’t post about that *again*. We’ve been swimming and making new friends and reading everything from Pippi Longstocking to Eckhard Tolle.

Eventually we will do something worth blogging about and I’ll start posting again. For now it’s just too darned hot. So, we’ll just pop in on Fridays for {this moment} til we have something to say.