On Buying a Kid a Horse, or ‘Heeeeere’s Johnny!’

Our 10 year old daughter is 5’5″ tall. To those of you who have never had a child and a pony and worked like heck to make sure they work well together, this information on her height may not seem to have any connection to the topic proposed by the title of this post. To those of who who have, or have enough experience to imagine, understanding that her small pony was no longer a good fit will be simple.

Wind, the outgrown and much missed Punk Ass Pony

A horse is measured in hands. A hand is 4″. A pony who is 13.2 then is 54″ tall. A child who is 65″ tall looks a bit ridiculous astride something so diminutive and horse show judges penalize that. We are not hard-core horse show folks but the kids likes to show and we enjoy taking her and given those facts, we really do need to do our best to make sure she doesn’t look like a complete idiot riding into the ring.

Shrimp on the Barbie, the mini

We had to sell the pony. A heart-wrenching experience which netted a decent amount of money to spend on her next mount. We never intended to part with this pony and she can’t remember life without him. He was born on our farm when she was 3 years old. Sell him we did, though, and while we miss him, selling was the right thing to do and now he has another little girl who loves and spoils him.

In the trailer at the farm where he used to live.

Then we began shopping. Well, not exactly, then I made a list of the things I thought were important in a mount for a 10 year old child. Things beyond the bare-bones necessities of soundness, having been handled and being at least somewhat well-trained. This horse had a longer list of must-haves.

Here is my list:

the horse had to be a gelding, no other option, no other sex, in other words NO MARES.

I wanted her to have a Quarter Horse. Because she rides hunt seat AQHA horses are somewhat uncommon. I didn’t care. Temperament was of critical importance and I have and probably always will be partial to the calm, kind demeanor of this breed. I would consider a Paint–same thing with spots.

This horse needed to be honest and kind. Eventually I want her boyfriend to be like this but for now I was aiming at the horse: Patient. Kind. The sort of animal who will be her best buddy. A horse she can sit on bareback while he grazes in the daisies on sunny days and take on weekend trail rides and hang with on rainy days in his stall.

As shallow as it is, I wanted her new horse to be pretty. Wind was beautiful. Stunning even. I didn’t want to replace him with some old drudge of a horse.

Bonus points would go for a horse that had been shown; had showmanship experience; was of an age and experience level to not require us sending him to a trainer; and a price that would leave me a few bucks to buy myself a trail horse.

The hard part came in when I asked friends to help me shop. Some of them wanted to give me phone numbers for nothing but mares (you know who you are!), many tried to convince me that we needed to look at other breeds (they were actually correct), some didn’t get the part about wanting a horse that was young enough for her ride for several more years. I took all numbers and didn’t call any of them whose horse didn’t already fit the parameters I had established.

We wound up looking at horse after horse after horse. One we loved but he was too green. Several we didn’t love at all. One was crippled and sad. Another we couldn’t properly assess because we couldn’t see him being ridden or ride him ourselves. I kept on looking. One we fell absolutely in love with, Martina and I, but Mark didn’t like him at all and we had to let that one go in spite of our deep affection.

Eventually we adopted a miniature horse from USERL. She’s adorable, rotten, bratty and precious. We love her and are thrilled to have her punky, sassy, dappled little butt in our barn. But the kid can’t *ride* Barbie.

Finally I told her we were going to look at One. More. Horse. If we didn’t like him I was calling the search off for a month or two. Looking at horses can be exhausting.

Working on showmanship, a skill Johnny already has and is teaching Martina.

We went. We looked. We watched and groomed and groped and petted and rode. And he fit every single one of my criterion. Every. Single. One. It was difficult sometimes ignoring the advice about all of the fine and wonderful mares available. Also the recommendations for large ponies, that especially was hard to overlook because ponies are wonderful and special creatures. Now we have a beautiful new addition to our barn. A kind, personable, genteel gelding who is gorgeous, has great legs and a wonderful work ethic, carries himself in a beautiful frame and is the right size and age for our daughter. Sticking to my guns got a little difficult at times but I am so, incredibly happy that I did it and that we found the right horse not just for her, but for our family.

 

 

 

and Then There Was School Stuff

I’ve been MIA for a while, particularly from this blog. In fact, I was thinking I might be finished with blogging. It’s something you have to do because you enjoy it, at least that’s why I do it. It’s not about fame and fortune but about sharing what we’re up to in our homeschool and sometimes, our family life and I don’t care about becoming famous. What I do care about is recording a few things for my kids to look back on and hopefully sharing some useful tidbit here and there for those of you who are also parenting and/or swimming along in the homeschooling currents with us. Maybe I’m not quite done after all.

This year Martina (and yes, I called her Minerva for a while thanks to a few creepers but I just can’t do it anymore) will be in 4th grade. We are moving away from a Waldorf focus, though not completely. What’s working for us right now is doing a lot of reading aloud in the mornings, music after lunch, then math and science, then hand work while we listen to audiobooks. Our days are fuller than they were and that’s part of advancing through the grades. I try not to answer the telephone until we are finished and often ignore my needy husband when he shows up in the midst of read-aloud time. We really do need to stay on-task this year.

In short, I’m feeling the pressure! Martina does well on the annual standardized tests required by state law each year and I want her to have that back-pat each summer. Regardless of my lack of enthusiasm for hoop-jumping, it is what it is: validation.

What are we reading aloud? So far our topics to cover are these: Vikings; the Middle Ages; English; Math; Science; Handwork; History; Nature Study; Foreign Language; Poetry; Local Geography; Zoology; Norse Mythology. Sounds like a lot, eh? But I’m not finished! We have a co-op where I teach and the Martian attends classes. I will be teaching Beowulf for Middle Grades and Norse Mythology for little people. My child will be in: Beowulf!; Girl Scouts; Celtic Choir and; Creative Gaming. Then there are the extra-curriculars! Piano; Ukelele; Recorder; dance; horseback riding; 4H.

Whew! It sounds like an awful lot and I think parents with school kids have a gigantic load what with school, homework and then soccer and PTA? Why do I think that? Oh yeah, I did it for a long time…yes, Kindy through a UNC degree for my eldest. I can’t see that either way is easier, except in specific ways that are so different they don’t even merit addressing. Parenting and schooling a child are work and no matter how you it, it’s hard and rewarding and wonderful.

Links for specific tomes are in the sidebar, listed by Grade Level and Subject.

 

Disheartened

This is a picture of a nine year old girl riding a five year old pony at a horse show.

This is a story of a mother’s frustration at how unfairly people, not just horse show judges, can treat children who are tall for their age.

Look at this face, the neck, the cheek, the expression...

Maybe this will cause someone, someday, to stop and ask herself, “How old is this kid? Let me actually look at this child and see her for herself and not judge her by some preset size standard.” Maybe someone will make a small adjustment and cause a little less hurt because of it. Also allow me to preface my complaints by saying I understand that in the world of problems, a child whose braids are too long for the taste of one horse show judge is miniscule, but since this is my blog and the post is about my child, I’m going to talk about it a little bit.

You see, Martina shows in a class designed for kids 10 and under. She is 9. In most of the divisions she rides in, she is the largest child in the class. Generally she is in the middle of the pack age-wise, but she is always the tallest and because she’s so tall some of the judges treat her differently, as if her height has some deeper soul-meaning. As if, because she is tall, she is also smarter, more capable, more competent than other children of the same chronological age. I remember going through exactly this with my 24 year old son. It made me angry then, too.

This post is also about honoring the girl’s ability to ride a green pony into a ring full of other ponies ridden by other inexperienced riders. I want to tell the world that she works about five times as hard as any other rider out there because her pony is young and has little idea what he’s doing and so she has to be the voice of experience for him while learning what’s going on herself. As a team the two of them really are amazing, even when this doesn’t show in the ribbons they win.

After a recent show, our trainer spoke to the judge and found out that the judge for the Walk Trot Equitation’s main reason for marking my daughter down was because of her braids. She doesn’t seem to believe that this 9 year old child should be wearing them because she’s TOO BIG and it makes her look like a poser*. Only in this case, it’s a kid being just exactly what she is: a little kid riding her pony in a class designed for little kids and ponies.

The judge also had other things to say, like that the pony was too forward (and I agree that he was for the first two classes of the division) and that my daughter’s position is beautiful and that she did everything she should have and did it quite well. Good feedback and some positive, which is always nice.

I told Martina some of what was said. She knew I took the call, she eavesdropped the entire time and she was the subject of conversation. Her decision is to continue to wear braids. She has no desire to put her hair into a hair net just yet. My advice to her was that we set goals independent of winning ribbons and focus on those goals, with any ribbons being bonuses. She agrees that she will try that approach, even though letting go of her deeply competitive nature is going to be difficult.

We’ll see how it goes. This is an opportunity for growth for us, in the way we focus our attention at shows as well as how petty we allow ourselves to become when she doesn’t place as well as we think she should have. We are growing and evolving and trying really hard but sometimes my protective mama bear nature gets the best of me, especially in situations where my child is being treated unfairly. We were only disheartened for a little while though. Now we are determined to work harder, be more committed and to remember that this is, above all, supposed to be fun.

 *my word, not hers

Note: In English (Hunt Seat) equitation classes, little girls typically wear braids with bows, jodhpurs and paddock boots until they are 12 or 13 years old. This is what is right and proper. I guess it’s only actually true of petite children (apologies, I do tend to use the descriptive ‘girl’ though this applies to boys as well.) Though a boy would probably not be so proper in braids and bows in the English show ring.

 

The Monotheme

Yep, you’ve got it, I am completely hyperfocused on ponies lately. Well, pony. Because I’m suffering from lack of desire to blog compounded by lots of time at the barn.
Pictures:

 

Gwynyfar of Aquitaine

We had a blast making this little video. About $20 worth of thrift store clothing and a quilt, some of my time at the sewing machine and a speaker wire circlet and we had a Medieval princess. Homeschool history lesson. Next in line is a book about the Magna Charta.

&amp

 

4H

My daughter has discovered 4H. Obviously this required my complicity, maybe even a little shove from behind, but as of right now she loves it. Who knew a kid could be over-the-moon about a CPR demo? That’s what the speaker at her first meeting did and she is certain that she can now save lives. What could be cooler than that?

Well, Italian Night for one thing. This is, from what I understand, the big annual fund raiser for the group. The kids are supposed to seek out donations from local businesses, artists and artisans. They also sell tickets. The tickets were F$7 and I think that’s a deal for all you can eat supper! The moms, and the older teens, bake cakes for the cake walk and make piles of pasta, salad and other Italian foods for dinner.

Our 4H group has come up with an ingenious plan which involved a point system for awarding the funds raised. The children get points for things like items donated to the Silent Auction, bringing a dish, selling 10 tickets and such. Each point is worth a set dollar value at the end of the year and may be used toward camps and other 4H sponsored events. This way the biggest rewards go to those who work the hardest. A great plan, in my opinion.

We spent the day working on the cake pictured above and it was M’s fondest wish to win it back in the cake walk and you know what? She did! And just this minute she came and told me she had eaten a banana and an orange for breakfast and I just looked at her and said, “Yes.” She’s slicing the cake now.

 

Spring Work

Well…it hasn’t sprung yet but this is still the beginning of our Spring school semester. What are we up to besides freezing our bums off at the barn? Well…it’s not so Waldorfy but it’s what we have to do for now.

Mavis Beacon typing program. M does this each morning first thing and then moves on to History at Our House’s free art program. Next week she will begin the Music History course.

At home we’ll be covering measurement, this time volume and weight, as well as continuing the +, -, X, / worksheets for practice. We will also be doing MLBs on Norse mythology and Magic. Magic you ask? Yep. Today we begin study of the four pagan quarter festivals. I think it will be great fun!

At co-op, where I’m teaching a class for the 6-8 year olds, she will take Journalism, Choir, Drama and Chess.

Away from home M will take piano lessons, riding lessons and will begin meetings with a local 4H equestrian group.

Busy, busy and excited about it! The decision to do so much outschooling and the online classes was based in my own need for more time to manage the several smaller and one fairly demanding business I’m running from home.

It may be cold outside but looking forward to this semester, we definitely have a ‘Spring’ in our step!

 

The Wind Experiment, Days 4 and 5

I’m off a day somehow but am going to roll with it. We missed riding the past 2 days because by the time we finished feeding on Wednesday morning it was 8:30 am and Martina was as flushed as she could be. I asked if she was ready to ride and she nodded her damp little head, “No. I’ll ride this afternoon.” By then it was raining pretty hard. Ditto for Thursday, all day. So no rides for the past 2 days.

We do like riding in the rain. This time of year it’s often far more comfortable than riding in the sunshine. Not when it’s pouring too hard to see, though. That’s just miserable.

 

Day 3, The Wind Experiment

Day 3, riding Wind

Apart from noticing how much more natural Martina looks in her barrel saddle as opposed to her Argentinian-made forward seat, I have to say that the pony looks much calmer. I think he prefers the larger saddle, surprisingly enough. It may be that the rider is more secure which makes him feel more secure. She is also relearning to ride with a looser rein, which the pony appreciates. When she rides with direct contact, he gets all flustered, when there’s just a little loop to the rein, he is far calmer and easier to handle.

The pony turns very nicely to the left but does not want to bend to the right. We will do a lot of flexing exercises to work on this. We use the barrel and cones for weaving, clover leaf patterns and other games. On Tuesday I put a jalapeno on the barrel and had her ride over, pick it up, carry it to the fence rail and put it down. The garden is right there! LOL. She likes that type of game and the pony seems to enjoy that more than circle after circle, though he is tolerating that as well.

Things are looking up.

3 days riding this week so far.

 

Day 2, The Wind Experiment

No ride. Martina slept until 9am and I let her as we had an exhausting week and weekend. By the time we got to the barn, the horseshoer was there and he wasn’t finished til after noon. It was too hot then, so we agreed she would ride in the evening.

Mark had other ideas though, involving the specific type of meat he wanted for supper. So, Day Two and we have already missed a day.